winscenario: (fifty nine.)
Captain James T. Kirk ([personal profile] winscenario) wrote in [community profile] quaranmeme 2018-01-04 12:26 pm (UTC)

[ It feels wrong. Jim feels as though he's just done something terrible, even if he did it to be rid of the plant's barrier. It's worse than just that, though.

Because he knows he teased John, and he enticed him more than he should have. He probably touched him more than he needed to before they kissed, and worst of all, he enjoyed it all a little too much.

He of all people can recognize attraction when he feels it, and that's what it is. He's attracted to John. Granted, it changes absolutely nothing, because he's still in love with Bones and he still wants to be with him, but it feels wrong. It feels as though he was just using the circumstances as an excuse.

Distance is something he needs, something they both need desperately. A clear head that'll help them move past this, and maybe then Jim won't feel like the guilt might just swallow him whole.

He looks up at the plant when John points at it, swallowing dryly. ]


Right. [ He drops his hands from John's chest and takes a step back. He tries, but finds it a little difficult to keep his gaze on John right now. ]

I'm sorry, John. I didn't mean to... [ To egg him on, basically, which is what he did. Jim can't exactly play innocent right now, either. ] I should... probably go.

[ Distance will do them good, he thinks. Time to clear their heads. In the morning this'll all b easier to deal with. ]

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